Controlling Mother-In-Law Won’t Stop Trying To Change The Wedding Cake, Then The Wedding Is Called Off
Planning a wedding is a lot of work, and can be a bit of a nightmare. You have to book a venue, figure out a guest list, send save-the-dates, send invitations, book a caterer, go to the florist, get a dress—the list goes on and on.
As if all the work and chaos involved in planning wasn't enough of a nightmare, sometimes the people around you can make things even worse, as this one daughter-in-law to-be knows all too well.
It All Started At A Bakery
Mary (name changed for confidentiality) works part-time at a bakery where she caught herself in the middle of a familial dispute between a bride and her mother-in-law.
The engaged couple and the mother arrived one morning, and Mary could immediately sense that there was tension between the bride and her prospective mother-in-law.
Things Had A Rough Start
The mother went outside for a smoke while the bride and groom started picking out some designs they liked.
From the moment she came back inside, the groom's mother started to complain about the designs they had chosen—too plain, too many details, too small, too big. Mary said, "It was like listening to an old, cranky version of Goldilocks."
They Get Down To The Details
Mary pushed on and asked how many guests they were having at the wedding. The daughter-in-law said they were having 40, only for the groom's mother to contradict her and say there would be 200 people there—she's Greek.
When the daughter-in-law reiterated that the wedding was going to be small, the mother-in-law started to complain that she had already started inviting more people, and it would be rude to back out now.
Naturally, The Tension Only Built
Mary, trying to smooth over the situation, said that she has to follow the bride's wishes.
The mother asked why she even bothered coming if no one was going to listen to her, and the daughter-in-law reminded her that the mother had kind of invited herself to join in on all the wedding planning.
The Mother-In-Law Stormed Out
The bride confronted her fiancé about standing up to his mother when she gets controlling, so he walked outside to speak to her.
The bride and Mary then set up some design and tasting appointments for the next few weeks. Mary even offered to agree upon a password just between the two of them so no one else could try to make unauthorized changes to the order.
The Drama Didn't End There
One might, Mary was cleaning up at the bakery when the phone rang. She answered the phone, and heard a Greek accent on the other end and immediately knew it was the mother-in-law.
The woman proceeded to pretend to be her future daughter-in-law and try to change the cake to accommodate more guests. However, when Mary asked her for the password, she was stumped and hung up.
Mary Decided To Check In
The next day, Mary called the bride to check in about the "changes" she had tried to make the night before. The bride was obviously confused since she hadn't called at all.
However, after Mary explained that there had been a request to change the cake size to be much larger, the bride caught onto what was going on.
The Mother-In-Law Decided To Come Back To The Bakery
Another day, Mary was working in the back of the bakery when she heard a familiar accent coming from the counter area.
Moments later, the 16-year-old working the counter came to ask for help: the mother was claiming to be the bride and trying to change the order. Because of the past issues, she'd been asked to show photo I.D., but she then just started complaining about the service to other customers around her. The groom's mother then said she'd be back when she could speak to a manager.
The Bakery Showdown Only Got More Intense
When the manager arrived, she took the mother of the groom into her office and told Mary to call the bride.
Soon enough, the groom walked in looking furious while the bride, right next to him, looked close to tears. Mary, her manager, and the bride and groom all entered the office.
The Mother-In-Law Looked Smug Until Her Son Walked In
The groom asked his mother what she was doing here, to which she responded that the staff had been unhelpful. The manager let her know that her employees were following protocol about how changes can be made to an order.
The mother said that her son wanted a large celebration, to which he replied, "No, I don't. We both want to have a small wedding."
They Settled Up There
Since the issue was quite simply a family matter, the manager asked the bride to confirm some details and informed her that, due to the circumstances, a password could not be used: only the bride with her I.D. would be able to make any further changes in person.
In the end, the groom, bride, and mother-in-law left; the mother-in-law was officially banned from the bakery, and, if she showed up again and refused to leave, the staff would call the police.
But The Mother-In-Law Persisted
One morning, starting at 4 a.m., Mary started hearing the phone ring at the bakery. She ignored it, but the person kept calling every five minutes for an hour. Frustrated, she finally answered only for it to be the mother-in-law, once again, asking about the cake.
Mary told her that the bakery would not open until 6 a.m., to which the mother replied that she can "see the lights on." Scared, Mary called the manager, but, by the time she arrived, the mother was gone. At that point, the manager called the bride and the store owner to update each party on the situation.
But She Wouldn't Stop
Despite the daughter-in-law confronting her about her behavior again, the groom's mother kept calling the bakery multiple times a day.
Finally, the bride and groom had their tasting and design appointment, but the mother called in the middle of it. While her fiancé went to take the call, the bride explained that they've consistently had problems with the mother-in-law overstepping in the planning.
It Has Apparently Been Rough Since The Engagement
The bride explained that her future mother-in-law had always been conservative and traditional, but it amplified after they were engaged—she'd leave tons of messages and show up to their house uninvited.
The groom felt stuck between the two women and tried to get his mom more involved in the planning process since she'd never been able to have a nice wedding because she couldn't afford it when she was younger. When all the details were confirmed, the couple left the store, though the groom seemed weary.
It Came To An Ultimatum
For the next few days, the mother continued to call and harass the staff at the bakery, to no avail.
Once again, Mary sent a message to the daughter-in-law (the two had kind of formed a friendship at this point) about what had happened, and, after all of the problems, she uninvited the groom's mother to the wedding unless she stopped acting so out of line.
Then Things Came To A Close
The groom asked his fiancée to reinvite his mother to the wedding and let her be involved in the planning again. When the bride asked Mary for her advice on the situation, Mary told her to just think about what she wanted from her relationship and the future and what sacrifices she was willing to make for it.
Later, the bride called in tears. She found out that her fiancé had been playing both sides—saying he agreed with her and then agreeing with her mother who said the bride was too controlling. She decided to call off the wedding and end their relationship.
Let Her Eat Cake!
Even though the wedding is not happening anymore, the ex-bride nonetheless decided that she still wanted to get the cake that brought all of these problems to light.
Instead of a wedding ceremony, she and her friends are planning to have a "celebration of freedom." And, yes, Mary was invited to the event too.
