A Mother Is Teaching Her Daughters That Virginity Is Made-Up
One thing that a lot of new parents tell themselves is that they're going to do certain things differently than their parents did. We don't realize until we are adults how flawed some of the logic is that we are taught as kids. And it isn't even our parents' fault necessarily, it's just kind of the way society is, and we've allowed it to exist that way for so long.
That's why it's so important to highlight the places that we can make changes, and one mom thinks a good place to start is the way we talk about virginity.
It Started With A Viral TikTok
A TikTok blogger named Nevada Shareef asked the other parents of TikTok to share with her things about their parenting style that others might not approve of.
The video has millions of views, and over 6,000 comments, so it's obviously a topic people feel passionately about.
There Was One Mom Who Basically Broke Parenting TikTok With Answer
Cayce LaCorte shared an incredible message on her TikTok about a decision she's made while raising five girls.
It has 2.2 million views and has basically busted the myth around the concept of virginity.
She Has Five Daughters Between The Ages Of 7 And 16
She explains in other videos that she doesn't want "the talk" to be one big conversation, but rather an ongoing one.
She wants them to know that sex is normal, and the way we think about it and what we know about it is always changing.
Purity Culture Is Really Toxic
She explains in the video that the idea of virginity and losing your virginity, are outdated and incredibly harmful.
Women have always been treated differently when it comes to sex and their sexuality, and that isn't right.
Women Should Feel Like They Own Their Bodies
The whole idea of virginity and "losing" your virginity makes women feel and appear to be objects, that their worth is defined by this one ridiculous idea.
Think about when you lost your virginity, did anything really change other than a bunch of weird feelings about yourself you couldn't figure out?
We Think We've Come A Long Way
We like to think that we've come a long way in society with the way that we talk about sex and sexuality and gender, and in a lot of ways we have.
However, that doesn't mean that there isn't still work to do.
She Makes Sure To Explain That Sex Is A Big Deal
She isn't saying that we shouldn't think about sex and our sexual choices—we should, it's important to make informed decisions.
We just shouldn't have to do it with this extra layer of shame that seems to linger with this whole "losing your virginity" thing.
If We Talk More Openly, The Stigma Goes Away
As with a lot of these things, if we are able to create a world in which people are able to feel more comfortable with themselves and their sexuality, we are going to have healthier conversations about it.
Society should put as much effort into making women feel safe as it does into the idea that women need to be saved for their husbands...I mean, come on.
Her Hope Is It Will Help Her Girls Find Strength Other Places, Too
Cayce LaCorte is hoping that, by stamping out this myth before it takes root, it will help her kids be stronger humans, too.
If she starts teaching them at a young age that their worth is built-up of so much more than these old ideas, they'll have more confidence when they're out in the world.
A Lot Of People Are Behind Her
There were a lot of people in the comments encouraging her and saying that this is some simple but life-changing advice.
She was expecting some pretty hostile comments, but the support has been overwhelmingly positive.
That's Just Further Proof It's Time...Maybe Long Overdue
There are other moms in the comments talking about how they are teaching their kids the same thing, and others saying that even if someone is promiscuous, that doesn't mean they aren't smart.
Even therapists were chiming in saying that this is good parenting advice.
There Were Also Some Really Touching Comments, Too
There were a lot of comments from survivors of sexual assault who were saying that by the logic in this video, they aren't "spoiled"...not that they ever should have felt that way, but this is the world we live in!
It's such a powerful stance for a short video, and it's encouraging to see it take off with such positive support.
Cayce LaCorte Says To Start Young
Her advice to parents who don't know where to start is to start off the conversation young with smaller talks about things like consent and keeping the conversation light and age-appropriate.
What do you think? I think this is an incredibly powerful message. Do you agree?
