The Strangest Gifts Parents Have Ever Gotten Their Kids
Let me just start by saying that it's the thought that counts—no matter how little thought it seems like people put into gifts. Parents are under a huge amount of stress trying to make ends meet and be good at this whole parenting thing...but sometimes they really do buy some seriously weird duds.
Here are items that people have received from their parents that left them all kinds of confused and uncomfortable. And really, there's a lesson here, and it's to just get your kids gift cards from now on.
Some Godly Looking Calendar Men
Priests can't marry, but there's no law against them being their hunky selves for a calendar shoot. I have to confess, I'd hang about three of these around my room and tell people I'm getting in touch with my spiritual side.
This Lovely Vasectomy Cake From A Mother
It's good to know this mom is willing to party for any reason at all. She's setting up a Facebook event, texting the relatives, and piping little white balls around a cake all in the name of the family jewels.
These Parents Saw An Opportunity For Giving A Chore And They Took It
Look, we've all wanted the other members of our family to help out a bit more. It's also rare that they actually express a desire to touch a vacuum cleaner...so of course these parents saw the opportunity and took it. They just might've pounced a little too early...
I Can't Even Imagine How Awkward Receiving These Scissors From My Mom Would Be
If your mom is so concerned about your bowel movements that she's willing to think about the mental image of you snipping your chocolate with these scissors, then she's either a good mom or terrible at giving gifts. Could be both, honestly.
"My Dad Got Me A Twilight birthday card. When I Asked Him If He Knew Who The Guy Was, He Just Said 'I Don't Know, Some Singer Or Something.' I'm A Guy."
What, Son? You don't like this picture of teen heartthrob Edward Cullen? Don't you know he's the singer of an indie band called The Bloodsuckers? You can't win with all the gifts, I guess, especially when your son is clearly on Team Jacob.
The Dad Who Forgot What Kind Of Engineering His Computer Engineering Grad Son Did
Yeah, you know my son, he just finished that engineering thing. You know, steam engines! He's going to be the best train conductor Union Pacific has ever seen on the tracks.
Ah Yes, The Dad Who Found The Perfect Yankee Candle For His Frat Son
Honestly, why try and change something that's already unchangeable? His son's house is probably already littered with dozens of empty bottles, so you might as well create an ambiance out of it.
Who Knew The Property Bros Had This Kind Of Fan Base
I'm glad this person enjoyed this very specific and not-at-all creepy gift of HGTV's golden brothers. If I were them, I'd stay well away from a table saw for the time being—I'm getting voodoo vibes from these dolls.
"My French Mom Got Me These Boxers Because She Knows I Love Camping"
There seems to be a slight language barrier between this thoughtful mother and this pair of American Eagle underwear. But hey, at least this son can escape the embarrassment by running away into the woods.
"In 1983, My Mom And My Aunt Got Into A Huge Fight. In Retaliation, My Aunt Bought Me This For My Birthday"
This is the perfect next-level petty gift this kid got from his aunt. Not only are drums the loudest and most obnoxious gift she could've given him, but she got him Smurf-themed ones just so they were the ugliest they could possibly be. God, I wish my family would feud every Christmas—I'd get great gifts.
When Baldness Is Hereditary, Sometimes It's Up To Dads To Break The News Not-So-Gently
The balding talk is a hard conversation to have with yourself, but it's good that this dad isn't shy about being upfront about how his son's hair is looking. Or lack thereof.
This Dad Bought His Kid Some Orchids And A Remembrance Card For Them When They Eventually Kill The Flowers
At least this dad is being honest about how long he expects these flowers to last under the not-so-watchful eye of his kid. He's doing it all while teaching him about life and death too. What a thoughtful parent!
This Mom Is Still Teaching Her Kid How To Clean Even When She's Not There
This is about how much confidence my mom has in my ability to take care of myself too. For the first month after I moved out she texted me every day reminding me to take my daily vitamins...that I don't need to take. So yeah, I feel this person.
The Parents Who Knew The Perfect Doormat For Their Anti-social Kid
Some gifts are weird, others are winners, and some are a beautiful combination of the two. This is the kind of gift every kid with a goth phase in high school who turned into a loner as an adult would love.
Perfect Gift For An Angsty 16-Year-Old
This is a great and subtle way to say your kid has no friends. Spin their angst in a positive light by just saying their BFFL is their family dog.
"Mom Got Me A Souvenir From Beijing"
I'm sure this mom enjoyed her time in Beijing and just wants everyone to know that. I'm not convinced that many people are gonna ask her about her trip, but they will ask her about how much it costs.
Shower For The Mobility You Want, Not The Mobility You Have
This is truly a bizarre gift from a parent since they're probably going to be the ones to install this thing. Maybe it's a thinly veiled gift for themselves? Honestly, after a long day at work and breathing and digesting food, I'd appreciate one of these too.
I Get That This Mom Thought The Cut-Out Would Be Funny, But It Would Scare The Crap Out Of Me
This is the kind of gift you burn in the backyard after it scares you for the 100th time when you come down in the middle of the night to get water. I wouldn't feel bad about it, either.
The Mom Who Forgot To Check If The Sock Design Was Appropriate For A 17-Year-Old
Who knew there could be a legal age for a child to wear socks? I certainly didn't. But now I'm thinking there should be since this 17-year-old is walking around looking like the kid at the party you wander over to in the middle of the night to see what they still have.
I Don't Want To Think Too Hard About Why The Mother-In-Law Got This
Why any mother-in-law would be fine with the mental imagery this conjures up is beyond me. If a family member is focussing on how nice you'd look in your new underwear, please proceed to throw a fit at the Christmas table.
"Parents Were Tired Of Seeing My TV On The Floor So They Got Me A Stand"
How generous are these parents? After they got themselves a brand new giant TV, they only thought of their kid and how much they'd appreciate the box it came in. Thanks so much, that's so considerate.
To Be Fair, Dentastix Look Delicious
I think we've all been tempted by this forbidden fruit, but few of us have ever reached out and taken a bite. Not this grandma though, she won't be stopped by normal behavior for her species or silly things like that.
This Girlfriend Better Marry Into The Family If She's Already Getting Him The Same Pants And Shirts As His Parents
If this doesn't solidify this girlfriend as wife material, then I don't know what does. Both she and the parents had the exact same idea for gifts for this guy, and I don't think that's weird—it's fate.
"This Year My Dad's B-day Present To Me Was An Egg Cup. Not Kidding"
I hope this person likes eggs a lot because an egg-themed gift for a birthday is way too niche for such a personal event. If they don't, then breakfast is definitely going to be ruined for the next little while.
There's No Weirder Feeling Than Getting A Cake Like This From Your Parents When You're 25
I feel so bad for the kid with a career, a home, probably a pet, and some life stability for getting a wild cake like this for a birthday. The weirder and more childish it is, the more incentive to eat it and make it disappear, I guess.
He's Only 7, He's Got Plenty Of Time To Find A Use For This Hygiene Product
Something tells me this grandmother was slightly confused about who her grandkid is. Not totally confused, obviously. She knew that it was a holiday and that a gift was necessary, after all.
I Personally Wouldn't Take This As A Compliment
Something tells me this girl was probably going for a different look than this one. There aren't many Monet-esque pig oil painting people in popular culture we can try to dress up as.
If The Shirt Fits...
I love how optimistic this mom is that her kid is going to somehow fit into a shirt that they never did in only a few months and that they're not going to notice it's been regifted. That's some top-tier delusion.
"Just A PlayStation controller. My Uncle Thought My Parents Were Gonna Buy Me A Playstation For Christmas, They Didn't."
This uncle definitely should've checked in with these flaky parents before going ahead and purchasing the controller. I'm not sure who belly-flopped harder on this one, the uncle or the parents, but I can confidently say they did it together.
The Dad Who Who'd Had It With The Goth Phase
Buying your Prince or Princess of Darkness this neon purple watch is a good way to very strategically embarrass them in front of their angsty friends. Never again will they be invited to the monthly Poe poetry slam, and that's just not okay.
