Parenting Isn’t Going According To Plan For These Parents
You can try to read every parenting book that has ever published, babysit to practice, attend weekly pre-baby courses, and get advice from other parents... and still not be prepared in any way, shape, or form when the baby does really come.
Kids will continue to surprise you and leave you baffled. All you can do is try your best and laugh at the mistakes.
Keep The Diapers On At All Times
"My daddy fail is having them in my arms - naked due to the superb weather - and she apparently thought it so relaxing that she let go and pissed all over me."
Let's just hope they were not in public because the location of the wet spot makes it look like he's the guilty one.
When Nothing Feels Like It's Going Right
"I literally cracked it on the counter, lost the contents, and held empty shells over the pan."
We've all those days when even the simplest tasks somehow still go awry. How does an egg even crack sideways?
Missed The Point
Baby monitors used to only rely on sound, but thanks to evolving technology they now also come equipped with cameras.
The trick usually is to have the camera facing the baby, but dad seemed to have missed that part.
Easy Mac Is Not So Easy
This is what happens when you try to serve your kids a quick lunch to save yourself some effort.
Unfortunately, it ended up costing you more time and energy to clean it out of the microwave and you now need to cook up something else.
What They Don't Know Doesn't Hurt Them
Maybe if you look for long enough, they'll assume they lost it and take the blame.
Or, maybe it'll at least buy you some time until you can run to the corner store to replace it.
Leave The Art To The Children
"Tonight was back to school night and parents were asked to draw a picture of their kid."
It's the school's fault for asking parents to make art. If a kid had drawn this it would be cute, but when it's their parent, the meaning takes a turn.
Welcome To The Adult World
Mom cracked her daughter's third birthday cake right in the middle.
Now the cake is basically teaching her early on that life never goes according to plan and sometimes it feels like it's breaking right down the middle.
Even Playtime Can Become Stresstime
"She had about 150 of these things layered and matted in her hair... It took me about 3 hours to get out 15.
After 20 hours total after pulling and working them out of her head and lots of hair loss I got them all out ."
A Slight Slip Of The Mind
This dad forgot his son's tablet on top of the car on the way home from shopping. It traveled a bit then flew off and got ran over.
He didn't even notice till some people pointed it out. The kid was not happy.
The Standards Of Being A "Cool" Parent
All those years of working yourself up the company ladder to provide a nice home and toys for your child and it's still not good enough.
You should've just worked at Mcdonald's.
If You Want Something Done Right, Do It Yourself
"Once upon a time, I sent my daughter and my husband off to buy her some nice new clothes."
Clearly, the daughter is too young to understand fashion, and the dad's priorities of what makes a good outfit rely more on humor than efficiency. This was a bad combination to send off together.
Two Birds With One Stone
This is actually an accident waiting to happen.
It may seem like you're winning and have cracked the parenting thing until the baby falls off the swing and you're too far to catch them on time.
There's Never A Good Time To Eat
"The only way my 3 day-old daughter would fall asleep. After two hours of carrying her around I got hungry."
When you have a baby, it's not uncommon to forget about yourself and your basic needs, like eating.
An Extra Set Of Hands
You might have thought that having a kid would give you an extra set of helping hands when they finally got old enough to walk.
Let us be the ones to tell you, you thought wrong.
"Four-Year-Old Curiosity"
The real question is who's hair is that? If it's the daughter's it's nothing some cute bucket hats can't fix.
If it's the mom's however... let's hope she doesn't mind pulling off a short do for a change.
Potty Training Is No Easy Task
You don't only need to worry about where your child is going to relieve themselves next, but now you also have to wonder if they're going to get stuck inside of the potty.
There's nothing in the parenting books to prepare you for all the places they could get stuck.
A Slight Mix Up
His mom mixed up pajama day and picture day. Clearly, the kid was not impressed, but it's hard keeping up with all these made school holidays.
At least they're cute Spongbob pajamas!
They Say Kids Follow By Example
We wonder who they learned this from watching. This 8-year-old son built Lego bars with drunk patrons.
At eight years old, we didn't even know what alcohol was yet, let alone the meaning of being drunk at a bar.
A Balanced, Nutritious Diet
There's a difference between having the intention to feed your kid an all-nutritious diet and actually convincing them of consuming that diet.
That's not even counting the snacks they secretly shove in their mouths when you're not looking, and what falls on the floor.
When The Bed's Just Too Far
By the time you finally put your child to bed, you might not have even an ounce of energy left to go put yourself to bed.
At that point, any flat surface will do.
This Was Not In The Parenting Book
"Mom, he's too hot and he needs a fan." Imagine waking up to this. The kid's got a point though, animals have a heat threshold too.
It just would have been helpful if he had asked first.
When Life Hits You In The Face...
When life hits you in the face, do not use your child as a barrier. It should definitely be the other way around.
At least this time the hit was by a soft, cushioned ball.
Don't Let Kids Dress Themselves
"I let my toddler dress herself. She's wearing a cupcake."
What he forgot is a kid that young doesn't feel limited by clothes to dress themselves. That's something the fashion industry later conditions us into.
To Infinity And Beyond
It's nerve-wracking looking at this picture and still being unsure if the kid lands in the pool water or if he was thrown a little too far to still make it in.
The look on his face doesn't help.
Sleep Is A Vague Memory Of The Past
Putting your kid to bed is not the last step to end your night, but rather the first step to begin it.
It simply acts as an anchor between the morning activities and the night festivities.
In The Spirit Of The Holidays
"Accidentally sent my son to school with his newly bought ugly Christmas sweater. Didn't realize what Santa was doing until his kindergarten teacher pointed it out when I picked him up."
It could have been worse. At least this is a natural thing that everyone does.
An Attempted Educational Field Trip
"My friend had her daughters at a zoo when she heard, 'Ma'am, there's a lemur on your baby.'"
What do you even do at that point? That lemur looks like it's claimed the baby as its own.
Don't Trust Anyone Else With Your Kid
"My little brother's parenting experience in a nutshell." If you haven't had a kid yourself, then babysitting is a foreign experience and something is absolutely guaranteed to go wrong.
But guess who is still getting the blame? Not the babysitter.
Dad Tried To Bake Cookies
As long as they taste good and you can still bite through them, it's nothing some frosting couldn't fix.
This dad, however, made a point to blame his wife and told his kid "this is what happens when mommy doesn't help."
So, If You're Considering Having More Kids...
Why did you decide to have kids again? They're bundles of joy and it's the greatest gift to give life and all.
But what about freedom, sleep, and cleanliness? Were they that overrated?