Men Who Got Up To Some Hilarious Husbandly Hijinks
Most of the time, we love the men we married. We did marry them, after all. They help us out around the house, they hug us when we're feeling sad, and they make us laugh when we really need to laugh. Sometimes, though, they make us absolutely crazy—and they absolutely do it on purpose.
Keep reading to see some husbands who really know how to turn the annoyance level up to eleven. Men, am I right?
That's Not How You Cut A Sandwich
You can cut a sandwich into triangles or you can cut it into rectangles. You can't cut it into whatever uneven shapes these two halves are. It's just not right.
Too Many Candles
This dad and husband tried to do a nice thing by lighting a whole bunch of candles on his daughter's birthday cake. That may have been too many candles, though.
An Art Exhibit
Reddit user michaelsiemsen posted this photo online along with the caption, "For the past two years, anything sitting in our garage that the wife says we can't get rid of, I've hung as 'art' in our otherwise useless front room."
Some Refrigerator Poetry
It's the last line that really clinches it for me. Is this poem going to land him in the doghouse? It's possible. But it was also worth it. It's art.
A Dragon Cat
This husband decided that it would be a good idea to shave his cat to look like a dragon. Well, his wife is certainly going to be breathing fire when she gets home.
Only Strawberry
Why buy Neapolitan ice cream if you don't like strawberry ice cream? You're supposed to scoop out all three of the flavors together. This guy is doing it all wrong.
Husband Of The Year
This guy is letting his wife carry a whole bunch of heavy boxes in the rain while he holds the umbrella over his own head. I think this warrants a divorce.
Special Messages
This husband likes to leave his wife messages in the carpet for her to find. Some of them are nice, and some of them are really scary. This was a scary one.
Too Many Screens
This husband's work-from-home setup keeps collecting more and more screens. Does he really need eight computer monitors? What does he do for work, monitor citywide surveillance? This is too much.
Some Wall Decals
This husband thought that it was a good idea to put decals up in his washroom. The font is very nice, but we're not sure how his wife is going to feel about the words.
No Poodles Allowed
These dogs are no longer allowed upstairs. They like to lie in all the beds and get fur all over them. That's why the man of the house installed this wooden board.
Out Of Reach
This husband likes to stick lint rollers on the wall just high enough so his wife can't reach them. It really annoys her. He does it just to annoy her.
An Event Worth Marking
Husbands very rarely win marital disputes, so when they do, it's an event worth commemorating. This sign lets all other husbands know that they, too, can strive to achieve the impossible.
The Perfect Present
Reddit user maddipotter28 posted this photo online along with the caption, "When you ask for a golden retriever for your birthday and your boyfriend gets you this..." Well, it is a golden retriever of sorts.
He Made Her Lunch
It's the thought that counts, right? This husband tried to make his wife lunch, but all he could cobble together was a danish, a handful of Pringles, two strawberries, and some chocolate-covered raisins.
A Note From Management
This is a very long-winded way of asking for the toilet paper to be put on the roll the other way around. We have to say that we're very impressed with this guy's handwriting.
How Long Is The Table?
This wife was out looking for furniture when she asked her husband to send her the measurements of their kitchen table. This is the picture he sent back to her.
A Less Than Flattering Drawing
Reddit user Inked_Chick posted this photo online along with the caption, "My husband said 'stay still, I'm gonna try to draw you' then he showed me this. [...] Look at the FEET."
In The Middle
This husband clearly has no regard for the integrity of a pan of brownies. He even cut it on an angle. How is anybody else supposed to get a proper brownie now?
The Moment Their Kid Was Born
This photo was taken right as this couple's child was being born. Mama looks like she's very much in her zone doing all of the heavy lifting. Dad just looks excited.
He Saw A Blue Box
This husband saw a blue box, thought it was pasta, and put it away with all of the other blue boxes. It turns out that you can't boil tampons and eat them with tomato sauce.
A Very Tall Lawn Flamingo
This wife asked her husband to get a new leg for their garden flamingo. He got a new leg alright. Now this flamingo is even taller than a palm tree.
A Little Selfish
This husband bought a memory foam mattress topper for his side of the bed only. Don't you think that's a little bit selfish? He couldn't get a full-size mattress topper?
Awkward Placement
This husband took a photo of his wife standing in front of a "hope" sign after she completed a marathon. Unfortunately, she's covering the P, causing the other letters to look like they spell out something else.
Her Profile Picture
Reddit user bloopboopboo posted this very flattering photo online along with the caption, "Coworker thinks her husband doesn't take nice pics of her. This is his contact photo for her."
Say It With Cake
This guy got his girlfriend a cake to commemorate her first fart in his presence. Imagine how this request went down at the bakery. I'm sure they make cakes like this all the time...
Through His Lens
This husband likes to take unflattering pictures of his wife when she's not paying attention. This one is particularly funny. We like the little version of her face in her glasses.
The Tiniest Bit Of Juice
This husband poured himself a glass of juice and then put the bottle back in the fridge with the smallest amount of juice still left in it. This is just plain annoying.
A Woman Scorned
Reddit user brunomarkes23 posted this photo of a photo online along with the caption, "My mother-in-law just ripped her ex-husband out off their wedding pic and keeps it on the [wall]."
A Special Dedication
Writing a book is hard work, but it's even harder work when you have to deal with a family while you do it. This dedication really does say it all. We hope his wife isn't too mad about it.