Parents Don’t Allow Kids To Attend Sleepovers Because They Think They’re ‘Unsafe’
When you think back to your childhood, you probably remember attending quite a few sleepovers. Whether they were at your house or a friend's house, they were a bonding experience and a quintessential part of growing up.
But now two parents and close friends are sharing their controversial views on why they don't allow their children to attend sleepovers, and it's causing a heated debate online.
Kids And Sleepovers
Snacks, pillow fights, movies, and staying up too late, every kid has memories of attending a sleepover with friends.
Kids love having sleepovers, and parents are usually okay with it and see it as a childhood experience. But not all parents are keen on the idea of letting their kids spend the night at someone else's home.
The First TikTok
Tara, also known as @t.c.huck on TikTok, is a mom and shares her views on parenting with her TikTok followers. Entitled "Unpopular parenting opinions," one of her recent videos went viral with over 1.6 million views, and it generated a fierce debate online. What is the topic that's causing such division? Sleepovers.
"This should be fun," she wrote.
Tara's Viewpoint
In several follow-up videos, Tara explains her point of view following a heated debate from TikTok users and backlash from online trolls. Why does she not allow her children to attend sleepovers? First and foremost, it pertains to safety.
"Can't trust what happens at someone else’s house. And then don’t do them at mine because that’s not fair," she explains.
Unknown Circumstances
"It has nothing to do with me not trusting my kids, it has nothing to do with me not wanting my kids to have fun...you cannot be positive that something won't happen to your children at somebody else's house."
Tara says she isn't comfortable with unfamiliar people being around her children, such as older siblings or other invited friends, and ultimately, false allegations of something having gone wrong can ruin someone's life.
Other Deciding Factors
Tara says that she doesn't care who she insults with her parenting rules or with the insinuation that something bad could happen at a friend's house, adding that nine times out of 10, the parents don't know either.
She also adds like aside from unknown people, factors like drugs or alcohol also impact her choice. "I'm not willing to risk my children's safety for them to have a sleepover."
Playdates
While actual sleepovers aren't allowed, Tara explains that her children are allowed to go to the homes of trusted friends for playdates.
Oftentimes, she's also present during these playdates, but whether she's in attendance or not, once it's time for bed, she picks them up and they go home together.
Never Say Never
Tara says that while her two children are currently not allowed sleepovers, things could perhaps change once they become teenagers. But she explains that her current view is there is no reason why her kids need to spend the night at someone else's house and not their own.
"Never say never, but as of right now, the answer is no," she says.
The Second TikTok
In response to Tara's TikToks and the backlash she received, her friend Eric, also known as @.eric.king, shared his own parenting TikTok that echoed Tara's point of view regarding sleepovers. He also offered his own reason for not allowing his kids to attend them.
"First and foremost, sleepovers are not a way of life, it is not a requirement as a parent to allow your kid to have sleepovers," he says.
Eric's Viewpoint
Eric fired back at trolls who came after Tara and says that his decision to not allow his children to attend sleepovers is a "personal" one, adding he only allows his kids to stay over at their grandparent's home.
He says that sleepovers are a childhood tradition, but they are not the only way for children to socialize. In fact, he says his decision is rooted in discipline.
Firing Back At Critics
"That's our parenting style," he says. "It's not gonna make our kids hate us later on in life because it's not like I'm telling my kid they can't have food, they can't breathe, they're not allowed to sleep...it's not being strict."
"Creating discipline in your child's life is one of the best things you can do." And Eric explains that he knows a thing or two about discipline.
Strict Versus Toxic Parenting
Eric explains that he didn't have parental guidance as a child and was allowed to do whatever he wanted, and took up smoking and drinking by 16. He says were it not for enrolling in the Marine Corps and teaching him discipline, he'd probably "be in prison."
So with this in mind, he wants to instill the same values in his children, and there's a difference between being "strict" and being "toxic."
Unsafe Environments
Eric says that his rules come from a place of love and what matters is there is clear communication between him and his children regarding why they're not allowed to do certain things. Like Tara, he views sleepovers as "unsafe."
"I'm not gonna put my kid in a position where when adults are in that position, things happen. Illegal things, victimizing, and stuff like that, so why would I put my child in that position? A defenseless child, when I'm not there to protect them?"
